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How Your Childhood Affects Your Life

By December 15, 2020Blog, News
BLACK-PRESCHOOLERS-WITH-TEACHER - Children Reading Listening

Over the last few decades, scientific research and analysis have uncovered a wealth of eye-opening insights into our childhood years and how they determine who we’ll become as adults.

One of the most fascinating of these discoveries (something we dive deep into here in this article) was made by looking at the brain wave patterns of newborns, toddlers & young children…They found that during the first few years, a newborn actually operates exclusively at a level below ‘consciousness’ — the subconscious.’

During the first 2 years of a newborn’s life, the brain functions at the lowest level of brain wave activity, known as ‘delta.’ And for simple understanding, ‘Delta’ brain waves are what an adult’s brain is running on while they are sleeping… Which means, a newborn (until about 2 years of age) is pretty much asleep with eyes open — which explains why newborns fall in & out of sleep so frequently & easily…

Then, after the age of about 2, until about 5 or 6 years of age, a child begins to demonstrate slightly higher brain wave patterns; known as ‘theta’ (one level up from ‘delta’)…

Waves Gamma to Delta

After the age of about 5, until they are about 8, children will slowly start to step into ‘consciousness.’

First demonstrating ‘alpha’ brain wave patterns, ultimately followed by ‘beta’ — however they still spend a lot of time in ‘theta’ brain wave patterns. Only once a child has passed 7–8 years of age, does a child no longer primarily function in the brain wave pattern of ‘theta’…

Well — it’s because ‘delta’ & ‘theta’ (which, as you now know, children spend almost all their time in for the first 7–8 years of life) are the same levels that are present, in adults, during imagination, dream & hypnosis.

Simply put: children, during the few years of their lives, are basically walking around in a constant state of hypnosis.

As they don’t yet possess full ‘consciousness’ — which is the ability to analyze, assess, think about, judge or reason any incoming information from the environment — all new information bypasses this conscious filtration, instead just going straight into the subconscious mind.

Meaning: unlike an adult who hears something & has the mental ability to analyze it, question it, judge it, or reject it, a newborn doesn’t (instead rather just accepting it all). Critical thinking is absent.

During the first 7–8 years of your life — as you did not yet possess a full sense of consciousness (your ‘identity’ was still being crafted; not fully functional) you just accepted what your parents family & teachers told you. You didn’t have any other choice; you didn’t yet have the ability to analyze it, so you just stored in your subconscious mind.

And, you likely proceeded to then act out this information…
You were basically being hypnotized (conditioned into a certain way of believing & being) during the first 7–8 years of your life…

One of the most common & accepted explanations for why we are born without full ‘consciousness’ — the ability to analyze & reason incoming information — is the idea that before you can consciously think, you must know what to think about…

“Essentially, before you can be conscious, you have to have something to actually be conscious of...”

The second part of this explanation, of course, is that growing up there are hundreds & thousands of different little things a child must learn to become a functional member of a family, community & society in general.

We may overlook these things, assuming that being a human being is a simple task, as we do these things automatically, but there are actually thousands of little things a newborn must learn to be a ‘human being’ in society.

That’s why you operating primarily in ‘delta’ & ‘theta’ for the first few years: so you can pick up these basics. You didn’t need to learn these things through some ‘being a human being 101’ class or textbook, rather, nature just made you operate subconsciously so you can just pick up these things from the environment around you…

You watch your parents & family, you listen to your siblings, teachers & community & it’s just a matter of time before the ‘rules’ & lesson you need to function as a human being — what to do & what not to do, what is acceptable & what’s not — are installed into your brain (as you’re operating hypnotically.)

You just download the information — which you do naturally because you’re operating in ‘theta’ — & follow along as a new member of the collective…

There’s just one problem!

This problem is that you the information you received growing up, while useful (hey, you survived — you’re still alive… good job conditioning) was also very, very skewed…

The people who are around you during these first few years (family, siblings, community & especially so, parents) were not passing along ALL of the possible views that exist about life, but rather their own subjective ‘beliefs.’

What they believed, they shared & you were conditioned to believe too…

You may have later challenged these notions & created new beliefs about yourself & the world around you (which we’ll come back to at the end) but you started with a foundation that was subjectively passed along to you…

Which is the main reason children will often become similar to their parents — ‘like father like son’, ‘like mother, like daughter’ or a mix — having similar life experiences & results…

Your parents didn’t have evil intentions (just as, if you’re a parent, you don’t have evil intention towards your children), they just simply did the best they can (just as their parent did for them)…

Unfortunately, as nobody is perfect, nobody parents perfectly either… so instead parents often pass along BOTH their good viewpoints, as well as their ‘limiting beliefs’ to their kids…

Because of their own personal life challenge, they may have passed along self-sabotaging ‘beliefs’ — like these — to you unknowingly…

  • Life is hard & an endless struggle.
  • Love is painful.
  • Life is dangerous (you must be scared!)
  • There’s never enough money for people like us.
  • Rich people are bad people.
  • People are evil, so watch out.

And because you were still operating at the ‘theta’ brain wave level, you didn’t have the ability to analyze this incoming information — you just accepted it.

And in doing so — in playing out those same beliefs in your life — you may have ended up creating both the same GOOD & the same BAD results that your parents (or other family members) may have gotten in the past…

And the research proves it…

For example, one of the more unfortunate, but real, research findings is that children of divorce are more likely to get divorced themselves in life.

Why? Largely because particular beliefs about relationships & marriage were passed along to those children growing up, causing them to take similar self-sabotaging actions &, as a result, get similar results.

And if you find this hard to believe or doubt that those who raised you impacted your life, remember that these ‘beliefs’ operate subconsciously (a level below consciousness) so you may not even realize how they are affecting your life today. Yet, they absolutely are — for better or worse…

The point is this: if you continue to believe the same things as your parents, family or friends innocently & subjectively passed to you growing up — never stopping to actually re-consider these beliefs & viewpoints — you may just end up repeating the same mistakes that they did in their lives. You may end up creating the same familiar destiny. Same input, same output.

“But, there is good news here!”

Before that though, let’s explore the next bit of the puzzle…

‘What about the next 10 years of my childhood & teenage years? How did those affect me?’ you may also think…

Firstly, scientists have shown at this point your consciousness has fully formed & you now actively display all brain wave patterns…

Which means you’re no longer in this hypnotic state, accepting all incoming information without analysis or personal interpretation.

Rather, at this point, you’re able to fully analyze, reason, think about & consciously challenge any incoming information.

All of this is also why, at these ages, children become increasingly curious to explore the deeper truth behind things…

So much so that their parents may hear an endless bombardment of ‘why’s’…

  • Why do I need to go to bed at this time?
  • Why do I need to eat this?
  • Why do I need to be nice to this kid?
  • Why…?
  • Why…?
  • Why…?

Whether you think that’s annoying or not, it’s actually a good thing!…

It’s human curiosity first kicking in — which is a powerful tool for clarity in life, as well as learning & gathering valuable life experience…

Existing information is also being more actively challenged at these ages…

Which is why it’s usually around these ages that children first learn it’s not actually Santa Claus flying around the world in one night giving them (& all the other kids) presents but rather their parents…

Or that it’s not the tooth fairy giving them money in exchange for their teeth, but their parent sneaking into their rooms at night like skillful ninjas & making that exchange…

Parents can no longer get away with little white lies because the child’s conscious mind is now looking for understanding, willing to analyze, reason & challenge anything that it doesn’t fully comprehend!

And the gap between ‘’incoming information’’ & your ‘’interpretation’’ (what you perceive from that information) now behinds to form…

During these ages between 7+ & adulthood, children are still much more susceptible to new information & ‘beliefs’ as new information doesn’t tend to clash with other information & life experience one already possesses — like it does as we get older.

Change is an easier process too, as beliefs, habits & behaviors are still fresh & not lifelong ways of being that are deeply integrated into one’s sense of self.

And then, before long, we become adults… (also being influenced— just in different ways… less by our parents & more by friends & co-workers.)

During these ages between 7+ & adulthood, children are still much more susceptible to new information & ‘beliefs’ as new information doesn’t tend to clash with other information & life experience one already possesses — like it does as we get older.

Change is an easier process too, as beliefs, habits & behaviors are still fresh & not lifelong ways of being that are deeply integrated into one’s sense of self.

And then, before long, we become adults… (also being influenced— just in different ways… less by our parents & more by friends & co-workers.)

What one hears & sees can now be subjectively perceived very differently for each & every child…

Meaning: what comes in is not necessarily the same as what is actually received, but rather is ‘’filtered’’ through your identity (your existing beliefs).

However, this is not to say that we do not get conditioned anymore!

We do — just in different ways.

Now, other forces are at play now. Especially as children are now being influenced by the education system (& teachers within it), friends, their community, the media & social norms & the ‘rules’ of society — which I wrote about in this article…

After reading this piece, one may assume that their faith is sealed; that they’ve been filled with certain beliefs that’ll either help them or haunt them — but ones that they can’t do anything about…

…however, this is not the case!

Sure — you were conditioned in many, many ways growing up (we all were — that’s life)but your future is still very much in your hands…

Think of it like a computer…

Just because a friend or family members logs onto your computer while you’re away on holiday & installs some ‘programs’ (‘beliefs) onto it, that doesn’t mean it’s going to be on your computer forever…

It could. It could not.

You could come back from your time away, become aware of these new ‘program’ (‘belief’) that got installed onto your computer & then proceed to ‘uninstall’ (or ‘overwrite’) these programs with other ones that you prefer…

Like weeds in a garden, you could walk up & remove that which you do not want, replacing it with what you do want…

The same applies to all the ‘beliefs’ ‘habits’ & ‘behaviors’ in our lives…

Just because they are installed into you by your parents growing up (or through your own personal choice later on in life) that doesn’t mean you can’t choose to change it. You absolutely can; change is possible!

In fact, I’m sure we all know people who, no matter what their childhood was like, what their parents were like or what they may have been conditioned to believe growing up, ended up become aware of their unconscious ‘belief’ & began changing who they are, what they do & the life they choose to live.

You have that same choice to change at any moment (if you choose too!)

The first step, like with any change, is awareness — you must become aware of which area’s of your life you are struggling in, as well as some of the ‘limiting beliefs’ that may be causing that struggle.

Then, once you’re aware, you can become to re-consider & re-interpret those ‘beliefs’ more logically (& in a way that better supports you in creating the future that you truly want…)

Just like you would improve a test score by going back over the paper, finding any mistakes you made (awareness), understanding why you made that mistake & then proceeding to rectify it with a solution… well, you can do the same with any & all areas of your life!

If certain areas of your life (e.g. your health, relationships, charisma, work, etc) are thriving (& always seem to thrive) it’s because you have supportive ‘beliefs’ that enable you to easily create success in that area…

However, if there are area’s of your life in which, no matter what you do, you seem to always fail at, it’s likely because you have certain ‘beliefs’ that don’t support that outcome!

“In which case, introspect & become aware, figure out why you may have believed that before, why it’s not supporting you anymore & what would be a more empowering belief to replace that with!”

This takes introspection & self-awareness — which takes courage — but it’s absolutely possible! 

Frederick Douglas said:

It’s easier to build strong children than to repair broken men.

 

He was right. He did not say that it was impossible, but harder. In this article, we have realized that the healing process was necessary and possible. We can do it for ourselves, but to make sure that the change lasts (which is our purpose), we must make sure that the children, the next generation build the future on this new healthy basis.
There won’t be any change if we can’t give this new state of consciousness to our children. We don’t want it to die with us. That’s the only way to make sure that it is sustainable.

That’s why we have worked so hard on making children’s books to educate the next generations. In these books, we have put all the elements to give them the confidence needed to navigate properly in this world.

So, if like us, you believe that a change is necessary. That we can have a better world. That our children deserve to reach their true potential, you can get your copies of our books to push the healing process further and build strong children with healthy minds.

Click Here

My African Icons Book

You can have access to the e-book now by clicking on the following images.

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